Hi lovebug,

When I first learned the term energy vampire, I thought, “Jeez… that seems a bit harsh.” 

Until I started dating one.

Now I want to protect the identity of this individual because I think they’re a good person.

I think, besides, you know, draining the life out of me every day, they were not a bad partner.

^{(I realize how that sounds, but stay with me.)} 

In short, I don’t think they were sucking me dry on purpose. 

But I’m getting ahead of myself, let me define energy vampire:

I think of an energy vampire as someone who saps your energy. They resort to a negative or low-vibe way of seeing the world and you can FEEL them pulling on your energy physically in your body.

There are a handful of types of energy vampires: maybe they constantly have some drama going on or they’re always full of rage or they’re a perpetual victim or they’re completely self-absorbed or they’re passive aggressive or they’re highly controlling of others or what-have-you.

You don’t feel good being around them. You feel drained. You feel heavy. You feel tired.

Also, they really like YOUR energy. Your positivity, your light, your joy, your outlook, your frequency, your happiness, and your attention is so satisfying for them. 

And once you get hooked to an energy vampire, that dynamic can be tricky to break.

Someone might not be an energy vampire all of the time as well. Maybe they seem fun and light at first, but then they start complaining and keep complaining every time you see them after that. 

When I interact with an energy vampire, I can feel it physically in my body. I get a tingly feeling in my solar plexus (the area right where the cathedral of your ribcage reaches its peak). 

I feel like someone has plugged into my power center and is using me as their energy source.

But energy vampires can plug into any part of your body.

They can plug into your head and make you feel foggy or indecisive. They can plug into your third eye and affect your ability to trust your intuition. They can plug into your heart and tug on your heartstrings in a manipulative way. They can plug into your solar plexus (like they do with me) and drain your personal power. And they can plug into your sacral area and affect your relationship with sex and intimacy.

So… you don’t feel great when you’re interacting with them. 

The best way to deal with energy vampires is to avoid them completely, if you can, to not engage with their drama or vitriol or pleas for attention.

That can be easier said than done. 

What if you live with an energy vampire? What if you’re married to one? What if the energy vampire is a member of your family? What then?

You can take a few steps to protect yourself.

I suggest doing this first: Recognize how you get hooked. Are they feeling victimized about a certain area of their life and they keep complaining to you about it but don’t do anything to change it? 

Don’t get hooked!

Decide how long you’re willing to listen and then set a boundary. “I’ve got three minutes and then I need to get on with my next to-do item for today.” Or “I’ve got two minutes and then I’d like to change the topic.” Or you can just let them talk and say, “That sounds really hard.” Don’t take the bait to solve anything. (Because you won’t be solving anything. They’re there for your attention.) You can also say you need to get off the phone as soon as they bring up their drama or reason for rage. 

When you stop giving them what they want (your energy, your attention, your endless compassion), they will move on to someone else. 

Be mindful though. My body can’t tolerate being around certain people’s energy for too long. I will start to physically ache because my body feels so drained. 

I’ve had to learn to be very discerning. 

Now, if you're married to an energy vampire and you feel drained around your partner more often than not, I suggest you take a hard look at your relationship. 

In fact, I suggest you get on the waitlist for my course on figuring out whether your relationship is right for you. 

If your partner is an energy vampire who’s draining you, chances are good that you two are not a fit. 

Okay babe, until next time,

Rebecca*

PS: Want help clearing any other entities (that aren’t human) that might be hanging out in your energy and draining you? I recommend a psychic reading.