The biggest lesson Oprah taught me…

avoidance coping skills intuition Mar 17, 2021

Did you ever watch Oprah when she was on TV?

I remember coming home after school, shrugging off my WAY too-heavy backpack, grabbing a snack, and plopping down on the living room floor to watch Oprah.

She had moved into her more spiritual work by this point so I loved watching the guests come on and seeing what each one had to share and teach.

Interestingly, it wasn’t one of her guests that really inspired me… it was Oprah.

Like all of the great teachers I’ve learned from, I believe Oprah lives a spiritual life and works as a channel. 

She might not call it that, but she channels divine wisdom in her work.

I believe that when you find the work that puts you into flow and YOU start channeling, THAT's part of your path and purpose. 

But I digress...

Oprah was the woman who introduced me to the concept of first you get the whisper, then you get the tap, then you get the two by four (to the face). 

Let me explain how I understand this idea.

Oprah says “Life speaks to us in whispers.” 

I agree. 

I believe that it’s intuition coming through. It’s divine wisdom from your guides. 

Those whispers can be subtle at first.

  • “Check in on your son... “

  • “The roof needs to be inspected…”

  • “It’s time to quit your job… ”

It’s the kind of whisper that’s easy to ignore or brush aside as a passing thought. 

If you ignore these intuitive whispers, they get louder and become more insistent. 

They begin to tap you on the shoulder. 

The tap can look or sound or feel different.

Here are some examples of how intuition comes through in different forms as a tap on the shoulder:

  • Intuitive voice:

“Hey… um, excuse me... You need to check in on your son. Something’s up.”

  • An intuitive glance at a billboard:

“Roofing concerns? Don't wait until it's too late! Call us!”

  • An intuitive body response:

Unbearable stress at work starts causing tight shoulders, clenched jaw, and a stomach in knots. 

If you STILL ignore the tap, over and over and over again, well… then you get hit by the two by four: 

  • You find out your son’s addicted to pills.

  • You wake up at 2 am to rainwater pouring down through a tear in the bedroom ceiling.

  • You have a nervous breakdown from stress at work and have to take two months off.

Do you see how that works?



Two by four. 

I’ve been hit square in the face with the two by four in just about every area of my life.

I’ve suffered physically, emotionally, financially, artistically, and spiritually from not listening to what my guides were trying to tell me.


I flat out ignored my intuition.

I knew something was wrong. 

I knew something was up. 

I knew something had to change.

I sat in a place of fear and avoidance. 

I let the pain of change and the fear of facing the truth control me.

And lastly, I didn't tell anyone what was going. I didn't feel I could ask for help out of a sense of shame.

I thought I should have been able to do it all on my own. 

The result?

Everything was harder, more expensive, and more painful. 

Ultimately it was a much bigger mess to clean up. 

I know some of you may be thinking, “Well, GREAT. I’m definitely ignoring the whisper. I’m well on my way to getting the tap. I don’t WANT to get the two by four, what do I DO?”

[IMPORTANT NOTE: You’re not destined for a terrible outcome with this lesson. Please don’t wring your hands in agony here. I'm going to tell you what to do and you can go do that today. Keep breathing please.]

Step ONE: IDENTIFY what you’re ignoring. 

Say it out loud to yourself, your partner, a friend, a family member, your therapist, WHOEVER makes you feel SAFE, seen, and loved. Someone who will not shame or judge you. Tell them you need to talk and NOT be beaten up for what you've done or haven't done—that you need kind and loving support. 

You can say: "I just can’t face xyz… it feels like too much.”

Bring it out of the dark and into the light.

(Don't have anyone to tell? You can click here to email me. )

Step TWO: Start taking BABY STEPS to start handling what’s going on. 

You may need to recruit help for this step. <<<< This is an important piece of the puzzle. Please let go of the super woman or John Wayne mystique here. It's not helpful. 

  • If it’s an issue with your child, perhaps you need help from your spouse or your therapist.

  • If it’s an issue with your work, perhaps you need help from HR or your boss, or a coach.

  • If it’s an issue with your health, perhaps you need help from a medical professional or a fitness instructor, or a nutritionist.

  • If it’s an issue with your house, perhaps you need a contractor or a plumber, or a handywoman.

Sometimes you also just need to SAY IT out loud to a friend. A trusted friend. They may only listen, but sometimes that's exactly what you need. 

Remember we want to take baby steps, sweet pea. Steady, baby steps are WAY better than sitting in a place of avoidance and fear.  

STEP THREE: KEEP GOING until you've resolved the issue or created a steady system for progress.

Once you’ve got the ball rolling, keep your momentum going. 

Again, recruiting help for this process can be a game-changer, ESPECIALLY if you tend to avoid, ignore, and hide from the whispers and those taps on the shoulder.  

You may not KNOW the steps you need to take to resolve what's going on. It may be out of your league. THAT'S OKAY.

Remember, someone else in the world has been through what you're going through.

Find someone to help you through if you can't figure out how to do it on your own. 

Remember lovey, facing what’s uncomfortable can be freaking uncomfortable. 

I know. 


Facing what’s been nagging at you for a while will start to bring your stress levels down almost immediately. 

You’ll become stronger and more resilient in the process.

And... AND! The pain of facing a problem now is far less than the long-term and greater pain of letting something fester. 

One path leads to relief, the other path leads to more and more pain. 

I know you can do this. I'm smiling at you right now. 


A big topic for this week, but a good and important one! 

I know MANY OF YOU are on the precipice of something big right now. 

People are making CHANGES in their lives as the vaccines roll out and things start to open up!

Why not be one of those change-makers! 

Speaking of awesome things rolling out... 

Doors are open to my Intuitive Rockstar course THIS FRIDAY, March 19th! 

Folks who signed up for the notification list will be getting the information today about their early bird discount!


Whoop whoop!

If you’re not on that list, keep your eyes open for access to this game-changer of a course coming on FRIDAY.

Until then, sending you a big you-can-handle-anything hug,


PS: This course is only going to be available for a short time until I close access to it. So be ready on Friday check it out! 

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